Make Friends With Death

Death in all it's forms exist side by side with life.

We come to this world through our mothers wombs. Some of us die before we leave the womb. Others die shortly after. Others die a hundred or so years later. All will die. I will die. You will die. Everyone you know and love and dislike will die. This whole planet and every living thing on it will die. Our sun will die. Everything in existence will eventually cease to exist as we know existence. There is nothing that will stop our deaths. There is nothing that will stop your death or the death of your loved ones.
Most people are afraid of death and close there eyes to it's inevitability. They live there whole lives in denial. And because of that, they live in fear and anxiety is their constant companion. My teacher, Mr Hilton Tam, told us to, "Make an enemy into a friend." A mystic or a warrior or martial artist understands the importance of making death an ally. If you are afraid of death you will often not be able to take part in the many wonderful yet dangerous adventures of life. Make peace with death and you will be able to really live.
People who make peace with death live very different lives. They can appreciate the beauty of each moment and person more often and for longer periods then those who live in denial and fear. They are more likely to risk and surmount failures and disappointments and to gain a life that they love.
We live in a world that requires us to make constant choices. Even when we do not want to make a choice we are making a choice. We are choosing to live in denial of our situations. We have chosen not to make choices. The results will be that we will be swept along like flotsam and jetsam on the tides of life and death. We will not be living in the real since of creatively and courageously interacting with our world. We will be like people who are sleep walking through life. And the sad thing is that we will die any way. We will die after living an impoverished life. We will die without ever having tasted many of the more delicious delights of living.
We can use death to put our lives in perspective and make new and better choices in many of the difficult moments in our lives. We can use death as our friend and trusted adviser. We can ask ourselves if we are making a good choice in the light of our own or others death. We can often make better choices in our lives if death is kept in mind before we make our final choices. Perspective is always a good thing to have in life. And deaths inevitability is a great part of any perspective about life choices.
We can ask ourselves if what we are facing is really so important or so bad when faced with our own or others deaths. Perhaps we are involved in fighting with someone we care about. Maybe we are feeling stuck and are afraid to do something or not do something. We can turn to death and ask it if any situation is as important or as bad as it seems at the moment . A good relationship with death can give us more freedom, courage, and confidence to do or say what we other wise might be to afraid or shy to do or say.
I watched an autopsy many years ago. It was on my birthday. Very symbolic I thought at the time. I was facing many life changing choices at the time. I imagined me being dead on that table. I asked myself what would I chose if I knew I would be on that table in a year or two? The choices that I made then helped lead me to where I am now, and I love my life.
I imagined people I knew and loved being on the table. I asked myself what kind of life am I living with them? How would I treat them if I knew they were going to be dead next year? I still ask often ask myself that when dealing with people I care about and who care about me. It is good to ask these kinds of questions before we make important choices in our lives.
So make peace with Death. Turn an enemy into a friend.